12 Rules I've learned in Business (and Personal life)
I am not a guru of sorts but I definitely say that i am a seasoned professional and I have mastered many things. From my experience I definitely learned many "do's" and "don'ts" of life. Here is a list of rules that I live by daily
1. There is a time a place for everything.
Although you may like to share your ideas, dreams or aspirations, there are certain settings that are suited for the occasion. Everyone isn’t interested in what you love or what you do. Yes, your best friend may love you but they may not be in the space to hear your about your new business venture or your love for life for the matter. In a business setting it’s quite different. Although there may not be an interest, a nonchalant response could very well be the next best thing in front of an audience that you may not have access to, yet someone you trusted has pitched your idea as their own.
Keep your ideas close and your dreams closer. Write or journal your thoughts when you get a spark. If you have a mate, you can share with them when you are comfortable.
2. Your biggest supporters are strangers
Again, this is a very grey area. We all love acceptance and support from our peers, family and close friends. However, our society has been programmed to accept the popular and the designer lifestyle. There is something about an unknown person discovering how great your product, service or skill is and they will have a fresh view of you because they have no attachment to who you are and what you have. People like what they like
3. Don't volunteer expertise unless asked (Everyone isn't coachable or take creative suggestions well. Most people won't accept they are not polished until an absolute stranger burst their bubble.)
I have been coaching for almost 5 years now and I have had many friends that like my advice until it’s something they do not agree with. People would hire me just to say they have a “life coach”. (It was all well and good until I couldn’t pay my bills with their acknowledgment). Again, being common among your peers and family can either get you big brownie points or create a space of resentment. So volunteering what you know, what you think you know or what you may be sure isn’t a profitable way of life
4. There will always be someone that is mad at you or dislike you. Everyone will not be interested in you (and that's okay).
In a world of acceptance, it is a hard pill to swallow if you feel unloved or unsupported. We always want to make amends with people that we somehow can never please. So why do we keep looking for love in all the wrong places? It is not because we aren’t worthy of it, we have a tendency of wanting approval from people that we are familiar with and have hopes that they can see the beauty in us as we see in them. NEWSFLASH!!! Until you can love and accept yourself, you’ll begin to overstand what pure joy if and not giving a care about people “liking” you. Once you put your eyes in the direction of self-love and enjoy the beauty of the world, you’ll attract so many amounts of love, you can then be in a generous space to love those that are angry or dislike you.
5. Keep your goals to yourself (unless you have a mentoring coach, a business partner or a supportive spouse.
As stated in point #1, you cannot simply share everything with everyone. There is a time and place for that.
We “water down” our own experience when you share every detail of what we desire to do and it seems exciting at the time of sharing, yet when we go to complete a task on our to-do list, we aren’t that interested anymore. We have to treat every goal, dream, idea as a big juicy secret and when it finally manifest we can joyfully share in our delight with those that are just as excited to celebrate!
6. You will make mistakes, often. (Failures are practice)
What can I say, practice makes perfect. Here is an example that should tickle you ~ if you really think you were bad at sex the very first time, why would you try it again? Sex is something we were told we should enjoy or we desire to find what the connection is right? Therefore your venture in business, self improvement or relationships can be viewed the same way. Keep going until you can proudly say “I am glad I didn’t give up”. Even if you are having bad sex now and would like to have good sex, keep trying (even with yourself) you can achieve the results you’re looking for *wink*
7. Always be authentic and never apologize for being who you are.
Just like a thumb print and DNA, you are the ONLY prototype with a specific purpose in this lifetime (or any other lifetime for that matter). Just like everyone else, you are trying to figure out who you are and what you are to be doing with yourself. When you let go of self comparisons to others, you then begin shedding layers of others’ expectations of what and who you are to be. Even if you are to offend people, just know, mistakes are to happen so you can get to know your light and dark side. Light cannot exist without dark. Go into the deep depths of your soul and live your truths.
8. Overnight success is a lie (but good words travel fast)
If it comes too easy there is a heavy price to pay later.
You hear stories about people winning millions in the lottery and become poor or penniless 1-3 years later. Well, they may have won the money but they haven’t changed their mindsets. Poverty thinking is more than what you have in your pockets. If you simply believe you’ll never have enough, you’ll spend your energy, time and money ensuring that you’ll have enough until you’ve exhausted all, even your health. Preparations for what you want is absolutely necessary so you can enjoy your fruits of labor before, during and after you’ve acquired the success you seek.
Each and every day we are learning and growing, so being an overnight success means you are done in a sense. What exactly can you learn from your experience that you took shortcuts to? The joy is in the work because someone is watching and once you’ve get the momentum going, the help comes, the investors line up and your name becomes greater than you’ve ever imagined.
9. There is no "one way" to success. Everyone has a unique path paved to their ultimate desire. (stop buying into high customer volume marketing. Showing you how to make money is how some Coaches/companies make money)
Everything you do is trial and error. If there was a cookie cutter way to success, wouldn’t we all have what we want? Think about it, a garage sale can become an overnight retail store if there was only “one way” to be successful in selling items someone no longer wants. In actuality, handing over your visions or ideas to someone that is attempting to just add you to the rung on their ladder of marketing success can have you spending lots of money for the overnight success ideology mentioned in #8. If you choose to join a multi-level marketing plan, ensure that you gain as much knowledge as you can so you can create your own business strategy without buying into a structure that can cost you money in the long run.
10. Never share your space with pessimists or negative people.
Always do a wellness check with yourself on a daily or weekly basis. Recapitulate your interactions with your peers, friends, family or mate. When building a brand, venturing out on ideas or trying new things, you want to be very mindful of who you want to partake with you. Our brains are very delicate and can absorb unintentionally. A casual conversation can be a flashback when you hit a rough patch on your path. Some people do not mean harm when they share negativity or pessimism, because they simply may not fathom a “silver lining” to any situation. Life happens to people and when it happens, many of them cannot be present to greatness; to them everything comes with a price they cannot seem to afford. (There’s that Poverty mentality conversation again. Blog coming soon)
11. Do not ever despise people with money (how can you attract money if you speak badly about it?)
Once again I see a theme here; Poverty thinking. When you want more money and work hard for it, but you cannot see the fruits of your labor, check in with yourself. Are you misquoting that famous misquoted scripture? “Money is the root of all evil”? Maybe you are judging people that have money and you deeply resent them because you view them as greedy and not sharing with the less fortunate? How about when you see people stand in line on Black Friday waiting to spend money that we think they do not have for stuff we think they shouldn’t buy? Judgment puts us in a place of blocking our own desires.
First of all, the LOVE of money is quoted to be the root of evil. Secondly, people that are wealthy have their God given right to spend it as they choose. Third of all, people that enjoy shopping have the same right as wealthy people to shop. Apparently, they are willing to take the risks (if there are any to take) to temporarily enjoy what they may have saved for. If you judge them, you simply can never know, even if you do know, how is that helping you if you cannot keep money or even attract much of it? We are accountable for our own actions and if we want to see well in the world, we have to change our perception of ourselves. Be the good you would like to see.
12. You're never too old to learn something new.
Just as I am writing this blog, I come from a space where ALL of these 12 rules apply to me. I used to be a judgmental person that wanted to do well but couldn’t see myself having what I wanted. I had to learn that there are no limits. Limits are part of a man-made measurement system to lock our brains on an understanding of how we should move around in the world.
Each and every day, we can look up to the sky and see that there is no end to it. That is enough example for me to know that I am open to the abundance of my abilities to reach as many as I can with my gifts. My quest for knowledge has been with me as long as I can remember, therefore, life has a new adventure, new book, new skill, new friendship, new learning curve and new endlessness of possibilities.
A Alanda "Goldie" Gregory MFC Executive Life Coach/Authorpreneur
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